I am the oldest of two childern, my brother is two years younger then me. I have spent the uni holidays back home with my family. My parents had us late in life and it has been hard.
My father who is in his late 70’s has dementia. My mother who is in her early 70’s is looking after him. My brother lives in the same state as them but has alot on his plate. I live on the other side of australia from them.
After seeing them, I came to the understanding that I now have to move back. While planning a wedding.
My anxiety is off the charts, my depression is up and down. I am in limbo. All this is affecting me. I have put my health aside while here, I spent the week cleaning up my parents place with the help of my cuz. The fights and the stress sucked me dry, the dark circles, the emotional draining was hard to deal with.
I spent today in the longest bath of my life, washed my hair three times. I am still recovering from it all.
I can’t wait to go home and re-energise. I usually wont see anyone for a couple of days when I first get home.
There is still so much to do, when I get back we have to back up our lives. I don’t know where I am going to live right now. My partner can’t move with me straight away as he needs to find a job. So I have no idea how long we will be apart. I have no idea where we will be living in the end. So many questions and no answers.
It sucks that someone with PCOS where the body reacts to everything, eating habits, activity, emotions etc. I am so exhuasted and just want to find a corner and hide.